The Cowboy's Family Plan Page 2
It seemed surreal now, like a bad dream. But he gave a half shrug, as if that was all there was to it, when, in truth, it was all too complicated to explain.
“So how can I help?” she asked, the sincerity in her tone, the sympathy in her eyes making him wonder if she just might hold the key to everything.
So he took a deep breath, then slowly let it out. “I still have two embryos left, and I want to hire a surrogate to carry them. But I need to learn more about the process—the pitfalls, that sort of thing. I’ll be looking for someone healthy and of sound mind. I also want to feel completely assured that whoever I choose won’t have a change of heart after the implantation. You know what I mean?”
“Absolutely. Your concerns are all valid, and you’re wise to learn all you can before making any decisions.”
“So how do I go about finding the right surrogate?”
“What you’re actually looking for is a gestational carrier because you don’t need a woman to donate any of her eggs. Of course, with only two remaining embryos, you’ll have only one shot at implanting them.”
“If it doesn’t work, I’ll deal with it.” He wasn’t interested in going through the whole process again, unless he needed to down the line. But then again, the first go-round had been way too clinical for him to ever want to go through it again.
The doctor nodded, as if she understood.
“So where do I start?” he asked.
“You can, of course, try to find someone on your own. Oftentimes a friend or a family member will help. But there are also several reputable agencies, most of which are based in Houston, that can help you. I’d planned to give a list of them to the class during the third week, but if you’ll be here next Tuesday, I can give you one then.”
“That would be great.” He tossed her a warm, appreciative grin, glad he’d come tonight, glad he’d asked her to have coffee with him. “I’ll definitely be back next week and would like that list, so thank you.”
“I’m sure you’ve invested a lot in the process already, but you’re looking at another big investment.”
Alex knew that, but he could afford it. And even if he couldn’t, he hadn’t touched any of the insurance money he’d received after Mary’s death yet.
Still, he wanted to be sure he’d been given the right scoop. “I’ve heard it can cost up to a hundred grand, plus medical expenses.”
“That sounds about right, although it varies with each agency. And with each carrier. Those with a proven track record will cost more.” Dr. Ramirez lifted her cup and took a drink.
It was weird, Alex thought. Here he was, sitting across from a beautiful woman, having coffee as if they were friends, yet he didn’t even know her first name.
He wouldn’t ask—at least, not now.
“You must have loved your wife a lot,” she said. “The whole surrogacy/implantation process can be daunting at times, especially when someone has to go through it alone.”
To be honest, Alex hadn’t been very receptive to the idea when Mary had first mentioned in vitro. He’d thought it sounded too cold, too unnatural. But rather than admit to Dr. Ramirez that he’d been less than enthusiastic at the start of the whole process, he said, “Mary was a good wife and would have made a great mother.”
A shadow of emotion crossed the doctor’s face—sympathy, Alex supposed—but she didn’t comment. And he was glad that she hadn’t.
What was there to say? Mary would’ve been a wonderful mother, and Alex was sorry she’d never had the chance. All she’d ever wanted in life was to have kids and create a happy home. So when she’d learned that she wasn’t able to get pregnant, she’d been devastated by the news. But she’d rallied by researching all the options available to her, and before long, she’d become obsessed with having a baby—their baby.
Alex had wanted to start a family, too, and had suggested they consider adoption. But Mary had refused to even think about it until they’d exhausted all their chances of having their own biological child.
He’d finally agreed, and after the second implantation had been successful, resulting in a positive pregnancy test, he’d been as excited as Mary to think that they’d finally have a little one around the house. A baby. Imagine that.
But they hadn’t even had time to think about decorating and stocking a nursery when Mary had the accident.
The afternoon Alex had received the call from the sheriff’s office, telling him that his wife had been critically injured and wasn’t expected to live, he’d raced to the Brighton Valley Medical Center E.R., just in time to have a few last words with her. Important words.
She’d known that the baby she carried at the time wouldn’t make it. But Alex still had the other embryos. And Mary had begged him to make sure they had a chance to live.
“How did your wife die?” Dr. Ramirez asked, drawing him from his somber musing.
“In a car accident.”
“I’m sorry,” she said again.
“Yeah.” Alex cleared his throat. “Me, too.”
He’d grieved Mary’s death, of course, but he blamed himself for it, too. She’d asked him to pick up a list of groceries while he’d been in town, but he’d gotten so caught up talking to a couple of friends at the feed store that the errand she’d asked him to run had completely slipped his mind, and he’d gone home before a predicted summer rain hit.
Now I’ll just have to go get them myself, Mary had told him.
And Alex had let her go out to her car that rainy day—a decision he’d felt sorry about the moment he’d realized how dark and ugly the sky had turned, a regret he’d have until his own dying day.
Why hadn’t he made a note for himself? Why hadn’t he picked up the items she’d needed before stopping to talk to Dan Walker and Ray Mendez?
Now Mary was gone, leaving him with the last two embryos to think about, to protect and nurture.
No, he told himself. Not embryos. Babies. His and Mary’s babies.
But he didn’t want to open old wounds any more than he already had this evening. So after he finished off the last of his coffee, he said, “Thank you for talking to me, Doctor.”
“Please,” she said. “Call me Selena.”
Selena. It was a pretty name, and one that fit her, if you left “Doctor” out of the equation.
“All right, Selena.” Her name rolled right off the tip of his tongue as if it was the easiest word in the world to say. And as he came to that realization, a smile formed from somewhere deep inside of him.
Were they becoming friends? If so, he was okay with it.
Was she?
* * *
Selena wasn’t sure why she’d suggested that Mr. Connor—or rather, Alex—call her by her first name. Maybe it was because they’d somehow bonded over the time it took to drink a cup of coffee.
Or maybe they were kindred spirits because his plight was similar to her own. He couldn’t have his wife’s babies without the help of someone willing to carry them. And Selena couldn’t have a child unless a birth mother was willing to give up a baby she couldn’t keep or didn’t want to raise.
Eighteen months ago, following a routine exam, Selena had learned that she’d never be able to get pregnant or carry a baby to term. The news had been heartbreaking for a woman who’d always dreamed of being a mother.
She’d hoped that with time, she would adjust to the reality and deal with it, but knowing that she’d never be able to experience the miracle of conception or go through the birth process had really begun to niggle at her lately.
Okay, she admitted. It was way more than a niggle. She’d been so dismayed, so crushed by the situation that doing her job had become more and more difficult with each passing day. Every time she thought of the miracle of conception, heard the cries of a newborn or spotted the happy tears of a new mommy h
olding her baby for the very first time, her disappointment grew.
At one time, she’d thought she had the perfect career. She loved delivering babies. But ever since the surgery and learning that she’d never be able to experience the miracle of childbirth herself, she’d found it getting tougher to go to the office each day.
But she shook off the melancholic thought, picked up her empty, heat-resistant paper cup and got to her feet. “Thanks for the coffee.”
“You’re more than welcome.” Alex pushed back his seat and stood. “Thank you for agreeing to teach the class. You’re providing a great service to people who are struggling with fertility issues.”
She probably ought to respond and say something about being happy to offer those couples various options, but the truth was, she’d been seriously considering a career change of some kind and had almost refused to give the lecture series at all.
“Can I walk you to your car?” he asked.
For a moment, she wondered if his interest in her had been more romantic in nature than merely polite and appreciative, but she dismissed that thought as quickly as it had come to her. Alex Connor had loved his wife so much that he was determined to bring their children into the world and raise them without her.
She glanced at the handsome cowboy beside her, deciding that his offer had been a gallant gesture. “Thanks, but I’m parked in a safe place.”
“All right.” He lobbed another smile her way, sending her heart on a scavenger hunt for miracles that didn’t exist.
“Good night, Selena.”
She clung to the sound of her name on his lips, to the sincerity in those green eyes. But she cleared her voice and took a step back. “Good night, Alex.”
“I’ll see you next week.”
Yes, she supposed he would. As she turned and strode toward the exit, she couldn’t help thinking that Alex Connor was an attractive and appealing man. But she’d never dated the cowboy types—and didn’t plan to in the future.
Yet even more than that, he was still devoted to his late-wife’s memory. So Selena would do her best to shake any inappropriate thoughts about him.
She knew how it felt to fall for a man who’d never gotten over his first true love. And she knew just how painful a broken heart could be.
As a result, she’d vowed never to play second fiddle again.
Still, as she stepped into the parking lot, she couldn’t help being a little envious of the late Mary Connor.
Chapter Two
Late Thursday afternoon, when her last patient had left and she’d closed up the office, Selena had driven to the new Brighton Valley Wellness Center.
A few days after it had opened for business, Selena had taken a tour with several of her colleagues. She’d been amazed at all the facility had to offer the community, including a rehab unit, a state-of-the-art gym, physical trainers on hand to answer questions or provide private lessons, an indoor pool, a variety of classes. But more than that, it also catered to the disabled and elderly because of its close connection to the medical center.
In fact, Selena had been so impressed with the center that she’d signed up before leaving that day, telling herself it wasn’t just about becoming more physically fit. After all, she watched her diet and jogged daily. But joining the BVWC would also fit nicely into her get-out-into-the-real-world-and-start-living-again campaign.
Now all she had to do was find the time to work out, because she usually kept busy with her ever-growing practice. However, on the days she had another doctor covering for her, she slipped on a pair of shorts, a T-shirt and a pair of sneakers, just as she’d done today.
Now here she was, jogging on the treadmill and working up a sweat. With each stride she made, she pondered her options and considered the other medical specialties that had always interested her. The problem was, without going back to school and racking up more student loans, she’d have to settle on general or family medicine.
But not in Brighton Valley. In spite of the respect she’d earned in the medical community, she was giving some serious thought to selling her practice and moving back to Houston, where she’d change her specialty to one that didn’t revolve around pregnancy and newborns.
That was her secret, though. That and the fact that there were way too many nights she’d found her small condominium overlooking the playground at the city park to be painfully quiet, nights when she’d cry herself to sleep.
She’d loved that complex and the two-bedroom condo. But after learning she’d never get pregnant, she’d listed it for sale. And just six months ago, after selling her first home to a couple of newlyweds, she’d moved to a quiet, older neighborhood in town.
When her time on the treadmill came to an end and she began the cool-down process, she scanned the gym and spotted a man who looked a lot like Alex Connor. In fact, it was Alex, only minus his Stetson and boots. Today he wore a Texas Aggies T-shirt and a pair of sweatpants, rather than the cowboy garb he’d had on Tuesday night.
He was talking to one of the female fitness instructors—a tall, lean blonde with a healthy glow.
What was he doing here? Not that it mattered, she supposed. It’s just that she’d been a little surprised when he hadn’t blinked about the cost of hiring a gestational carrier to bare his children.
At the time, she’d suspected that he might own a ranch. But why was he working out at a gym in town? Wouldn’t he get enough exercise from riding and roping and doing whatever else was required of him?
So who was Alex Connor?
Ever since she’d shared a cup of coffee with him, she’d found herself thinking about him, wondering about him. She’d chalked it up to her interest in the relationship he must have had with his late wife, but the man himself intrigued her.
She shut off the treadmill, then stepped onto the floor, her knees a little wobbly from the exertion. Then she started for the women’s locker room, where she would shower and change into her street clothes.
Before she could get ten steps—or tear her gaze from Alex and the female trainer—he glanced across the room and noticed her. He waved, then moments later, he left the blonde’s side and made his way to Selena.
“Hey, fancy meeting you here,” he said.
She could say the same thing. Instead, she smiled. “It’s my day off, and I thought I’d get a little exercise in.”
“Do you like it here?” he asked.
“Yes, I do. It’s a great facility.” Her curiosity mounted until she asked, “Are you thinking about joining?”
“I would if I lived in town.”
Where did he live? And why was he here?
She couldn’t very well come out and pummel him with all of her questions, so she tossed out an easy one, hoping to get a little more information.
“So why are you dressed as if you’re thinking about joining?” she asked, prodding him again.
“I’m here for a couple of other reasons, one of which is business.”
At that, she couldn’t help but cock a brow. And he chuckled.
“Jim Ragsdale, who’s on the wellness center board of directors, wanted to meet with me today. They’re interested in providing hippotherapy for adults and children with physical and emotional difficulties, and he wanted to run a couple of ideas past me.”
She didn’t know all that much about the program that used horseback riding as therapy for the disabled, other than those who’d taken part often showed improved balance, coordination, speech and mobility.
“It’s interesting that they’re thinking of adding that to their wellness program,” she said.
He nodded. “I was intrigued when Jim first mentioned it, too, so I agreed to meet with him while I was in town today.”
“Why the gym clothes?” she finally asked, unable to avoid a more direct approach.
; “Yeah, well...” He sighed and gave a little shrug. “I messed up my knee a while back, and my orthopedic surgeon sent me to physical therapy, which I get here.”
“How did you get hurt?” she asked.
“I...uh... Well, it was pretty stupid.”
“Most accidents are.”
Alex chuffed. “I thought I was immune to that sort of thing, but that’s what I get for taking shortcuts and not keeping my mind on my work.”
He still hadn’t told her what he’d done, but she refrained from pushing any further. After all, his injury really wasn’t any of her business.
“So what are you doing now?” he asked.
“I’m going to head home and get a bite to eat.”
“Oh, yeah? Me, too. Why don’t you let me buy you dinner? There’s a little café a couple of blocks from here.”
She wondered if he had more questions this time around—or if he just wanted to spend some quiet time with her. As appealing as the latter seemed to be, she shook off the feminine thoughts. “You don’t need to buy my dinner.”
“All right. Then we’ll ask for separate checks.”
As she pondered the invitation, shaking off the urge to agree too quickly, he added, “You probably spend way too much time around the hospital and this place anyway.”
He was right. And she had made up her mind to spend a little more time getting out into the world... So she said, “Sounds good to me. Do you mind if I take a quick shower and put on my street clothes? I won’t take long.”
“I’ll wait for you in the lobby area.”
“All right.”
True to her word, she returned within ten minutes. “Sorry I took so long.”
“You didn’t.” He got to his feet, and they made their way to the entrance. He opened the door and waited for her to exit first.
How about that? The handsome cowboy was well-mannered as well. She’d have to make a note of that.
Oh, for Pete’s sake. Alex Connor wasn’t the kind of man she’d ever allow herself to crush on—and for several reasons, the biggest of which was the fact that he still seemed to be in love with his late-wife.